Prose

Greyhound May, 2012


Poem Five
   Arizona is a cancer the spread of which will destroy us all, 
   the American child forbidden.  
        I sincerely doubt that I can ride far enough
        to get away from its stink.  
                                (Five miles east of Gallup, NM, May 21, 2012)

ASHES
A wildcat crossed the life tonight, 
I think it was looking for cats of its own.
Shadows of thought, the whistle
of a train in water, the groan
of a 'gator on the tracks, and
a drunken santa claus
in the road with a chainsaw,
saying:
       "Buy that tree from me 
        I will cut it down, 
        and I'll strap it to your roof."

Centennial mile, peripheral style 
narrowing down like a hole to hell,
and wildcats wishing
for a night on the town, where
the whiskey is free, the cigars
brought in on a boat.

First poem
Open country
   that fast and open
country

not far east
of where we started

there are no trees
out here

that fast
my open life
still romps
and

I am surreal
in all my going
I am open country too.


Second poem
god please forgive me
for I have already forgiven myself
the far away notions of my state
of mind, I am now moving again
me and my landscapes
are back on the clock.

an old structure, wind worn
sun baked waiting
personified, who knows  
about that place

   it is somewhat eternal
   it is entirely circumspect
   it relies on no one.


Gallup. 
    We used to come here in the early seventies,
    my family.

There was the large tourist draw,  a mass gathering:
"Come and see the Indians at Red Rocks!
Indians in rodeos, Indians dancing.
    Come and see Indians slide down  ropes
    extending from the high tops of poles!"

This bus, then: 
   There is an Indian man sitting in front of me,
   his ears and the skin on the sides of his face
   share a shiny wetness- 
    is it grease, of fire and song? See Him, 
    my Indian brother riding His War Pony.

We are still at war, and our collective life
    is on top of the ocean, 
    is under the earth, 
    throughout the air.
    The sky is a headdress.

Poem Five
Arizona is a cancer
the spread of which will destroy all of us, 
and I sincerely doubt that I can ride far enough
to get away from its stink.  

Poem Six?
Mile 58 eastbound-out-of-Gallup-seizure
(and if only we all could go away and come back like that).
Why is this so long winded? This. 

I am following something 
I am on the trail of something
I am east bound, and a man 

has a seizure:
the poor man losing his head
soaring and waving his arms,
in the window of this bus. 

Irony unfettered.


Mt. Taylor Once
America's work ethic is killing itself, 
we are so willing to work,
hard work, dedicated work.
     This really is 
     all about looking out for #1-

     Somebody call the fire department
     or something...


Mt. Taylor Twice
Used to look good
from any angle,
but now it is cold shouldered, 
it is ignoring me
and I can't even slow down
in order to try and make up.


Waves of return, oceans of coming home,
my form rolling across the sea
touching but not interpreting,
brushing, but not touching.

My own home has described itself
as something other altogether.

It has been that long, I have been gone
that long.


But somebody had a gun to my back,
and it was not my imagination, if I could
I would climb into those cool blue forests.
I would contemplate this something 
or somebody again. I would take  a good look
and I would study things, I would slow down
and settle right in.   

Grants
Patricio's Cafe, Gonzales Auto Parts,
El Canoncito Inn and Rest Stop.

Redi-Mart:
  "Breakfast burritos
   and Hatch green chile." 


Albuquerque I
The man next to me drove trucks for forty years
and recently had his liver swapped out for a better one
about six months ago. Nice man, with his reinvented liver
and his south valley tone of voice. 
     "Sure, the 70s was a great time to grow up in Albuquerque!"

I meanwhile feel disenfranchised from my own hometown
I am rolling into there right now, and it doesn't have that feeling
of home, it all seems so long ago life other than mine
somewhere far away, long ago, without me, I am.

Albuquerque II
More lights, nothing new
the place we used to call downtown 
and the same faces
   sitting, hoping, begging
   harassing, claiming, stating.
My dreams have included scenes
of utter disclaimer, fear, and "oh my god I grew up"
   like this, and somewhere in this town
   I have a brother, raising Cain, god bless him.
My time here is varied and rich
with my childhood, "oh god don't make me grow up!"
  I felt that way here and I saw myself
  like this, like this, like this.
               Bus 008, Amarillo, last call
               streaming beauty, and I was there,
               less lights, everything new.
               I called this place home
               before trading it all in
               for this something, still. 


Driver named Scott: Albuquerque to Amarillo:
"Smoking! If you think the last driver was afraid of you,
I'm not. 
     If I catch you, 
     I will leave you
                                 somewhere....
Alcohol! I know people drink on this bus. 
I drank on this bus, too, 
before I was a driver.
    If you're going to drink, please
    stay in your seat. And please, 
    don't come talk to me, 
    because I don't want to catch you, 
    and you don't want me to catch you, 
    because I am going to leave you
                                                 somewhere."


"I Have Arthritic Knees"
    So we rolled like that,
    left home, going home. 
    Listening to a 
    man 
    to a man from Modesto 
    tell me about hitchhiking through here
    to California, in the 1950s:
            "We only had few bucks on us,
              and we ordered us some chili,
             it was only twenty five cents for a bowl, 
             and you know what?
             It was so hot, it near burnt a hole
             in the seat of my britches, 
             we had to order crackers,
             over and over again."

Glisten
Lightning is flashing up there.
There, towards the east slope: 
Madrid
Galisteo 
Cerrillos 
Pecos
Cuba
Mora

(Dark centrifugal highways, nowhere else to turn).
It is during the night, I suppose 
that men answer their deeper lies
returning like grandfathers
begging to tell the truth. 

It is at night, when scenes re-emerge
telling tales, telling signs, 
all of those petty petty lies. Men

crossing every threshold
only to beg for forgiveness, 
once they are alone
like I am tonight.

Roll, let's roll, let's roll.....
I am neither the young man
nor the grandfather, and that lightning is laughing at me
up in those sacred blood of christ mountains
and I am caught here, caught again-
    I love my home, I love those mountains,
    so I am asking you: 
    How did I get here?


Amarillo Texas (Carlos)
Sleepyhead, now you've done it.
Arizona is lost without you, 
or haven't you heard?  
Since you came here
as though running from something, 
and not as though
running towards something, 
you will likely be looked at 
with something like crossed eyes. 
    They burn the lunatics there
    they send them home packing
    in pine boxes made of stolen wood
    and hateful prayer farmed out,
    the souls of 10,000 murdered apaches
    gently stepping aside. 


Third Poem (Steve)
Holy clusters tooth staining tumor causing
gathering by the side bus shadow travel
and the thin legs of one girl in particular 
in my mind too young to be this far from anyones' home,
much less her own. 
       
The driver's name
is Scott. I bet he has seen a thing or two.
        Has he ever seen a man pull his eye ball out
        with the thumb of his own left hand? 
  
Sixth Poem
Sky: where deep, cutting blue
becomes part of the inner eye,
literally clean, clear, with sharp wind
and rocky mountain skyline;
comes the flat, off yellow 
haze, no more big west.
I have now entered 
the main slab of Texas; 
the trees are shrubbiest
and hunkered, the grass is yellow 
and thick, diamondbacks snakes,
gopher snakes, no cactus,
and only feral hogs.


Trailer Life
So falls Wichita, so falls Wichita Falls. 


Seventh Poem (Ft. Worth, TX)
The Ft. Worth skyline makes me think of "Cops,"
the "heat" is swarming. 
Slowly rising buildings shimmer, and the bus is late,
we will be in Dallas for hours, unrequited.
To think I might be dead, or running 
along high altitude rail road tracks 
or pushing the speed work at 
Coconino High with doctors and Olympians. 

Just this morning (almost):
Cooking for and feeding the homeless,
and serving them-myself; 
sleeping with ear plugs,
fearing psychopaths,
challenging unjust authority
and addressing courts;
drinking at the Buffett,
or killing time with 7 alley cats,
bickering five spots off unsuspecting 
third street commuters;
sticking my nose 
to the very edge of the pavement.
        Caroming off verticals, flying.


Poem One-A
And what of the south?
Well, I'll tell you what:
Water. Grass. Thick Air.
Black men and black women, 
white men and white women,
hunger, sate, live humans, 

I am not too concerned at the moment.
I could have been anywhere I wanted to be at this point of my life,
at one time. I am where I am, in the eastern remnants
of what used to be Dallas, for at the first and possibly the only time,

I asked where the street was,
where Kennedy was shot 
     (and no, that little park I'd seen
     while stretching my legs between buses
     was not the grassy knoll, even if grassy, in fact,
     with a legitimate hump to it, even if not a knoll).

I am not concerned, for this is Dallas
as it used to be, even as I contemplate the place
the City Dallas becomes something entirely different
and I never wanted to know Dallas. 

Dallas, and the south, are slipping
into and out again, of my consciousness.
There is so much to my 
consciousness, now
that I don't even trust it, in fact,
don't even care to know
where I am going. 

Wherever it is
it is always changing,
and I've learned that I can't keep up.


End Road
It can't be stated.
It is unspeakable.
Prison like and formidable
my home is an end road
the sort that  we all sometimes go to
in order to run through
it all over again. 
End road
pavement grows patchy
weeds broken glass
a flattened and rusted can.

I am not in this for good
I am in it for the money.
Let's not mince words
you know it's only a waste of time.
So cut to the chase and
show me the money sucker.

Rolling in like that  
checks and balances
being what they are
I returned one last time
I think in order to organize.
And I still have little to no idea.

Louisiana.
Softness of greens, good food, hazel eyed sky,
and a new steeple.
Single lit room on the second floor
of the building I live in. 
Tonight it is plain, it is the deep south.
I seem to have found my way again. 
    How? Where am I now? 

Final Poem

        "Where you going, little feller?"

(c) all PJ Reed 2012

paoloreed@gmail.com

RERUN: Jesus Rincon Murietta: Wherein, the central character/victim subjected to one of The Arizona State Hospitals' most egregious scandals in recent history goes to prison, while the one's directly responsible for the cycle of violence underlying his conviction continue to draw their pay from Arizona's collective citizenry. 

As per the factual details of the following debacle, I attest to the following impacts as they applied to me as an ASH patient, 2011-12, as per my precise thoughts and associated emotions, verbatim from my personal journal notes documented at that time in my life:

"If these people are willing to put the interests and safety of the greater public behind their own selfish objectives, how am I to believe that my own care needs and safety are of concern to them? (April 13, 2011)"
(originally published in October, 2013) 

RECAP: Beginning in late May, 2011, following the failure and refusal of ASH staff to report or divulge information specific to the escape of a violent patient, and concluding most dramatically in late August, 2011, with the brutal murder of an innocent young woman, Arizona citizens as a whole were subject to the same forms of potentially lethal ineptitude that the patients at ASH are subjected on a daily, around the clock basis.
     Meanwhile, each and every high ranking state employees centrally involved in this matter are still benefitting from the trust afforded them through their positions as state employees, and at least two of them -Dr. Steven Dingle and Cory Nelson- have since been promoted within the greater ADHS/BHS public behavioral health care construct. Business as per the usual, in other words.  

     I was just apprised by one of Jesus Rincon Murietta's legal representatives that yesterday (Oct. 4), he pleaded guilty to second degree murder in relation to his role in the death of April Mott in late August, 2011. He will be sentenced on November 2, 2012, and faces the possibility of twenty two (22) years in prison and lifetime probation. 

     Herein, the near end of a saga that began in late May, 2011, when Murietta successfully took advantage of lax security conditions in order to violently escape the confines at The Arizona State Hospital, after which the senior clinicians most responsible over the ASH operation in general, including ASH's then Chief Medical Officer Dr. Steven Dingle, and Murietta's primary attending physician, Dr. Steven Morris, unlawfully altered the facts about the event, and in complicity with ASH's executive level staff (including ASH's acting CEO at the time, Ann Froio, as well the hospitals' in-house legal counsel, assistant attorney general Joel Rudd), willfully engaged in a blatant cover up of the escape itself, which I contend was designed to avoid accountability, and possible oversight and backlash from state and/or federal regulatory bodies. Approximately 90 days later (late August 2011), after running amok in the greater Phoenix metro area for the entire summer, Murietta viciously beat and then stabbed a young Phoenix woman named April Mott to death. Murietta was almost immediately arrested, but it wasn't until after an investigative story written by a reporter named JJ Hensley (of the Arizona Republic newspaper) was published on September 29, 2011, that Murietta's own appointed attorney even became aware of the fact that Murietta suffers from serious mental illness, much less so that he had violently escaped Arizona's sole long term mental health care facility in the previous month of May. Likewise, April Mott's family, and other persons directly affected by this sordid series of events, were not made aware of the underlying story relating to April Mott's murder until they, too, had heard these details through news reports aired or published 30-45 days after she died. (see: "Victims Family Questions Why Man Was Free", by JJ Hensley, September 29, 2011; AZ Central.com).

     As I have described in several previous articles, including one of my first, "A Modern Day Horror Story" (April 05, 2012), I was the sole primary source of information supplied to JJ Hensley in relation to his final report about this affair.

     I am not stating this claim in order to receive any commendations or other like praise. My only aim is to clarify one critical reality: 

Despite the fact most of the staff at ASH knew about this escape  (this certainly applies to any/all staff assigned to the CIVIL SIDE of the ASH facility in summer 2012), not a single one of them alerted anybody- in any fashion or context- about the reality that a very unstable and known to be highly dangerous person had violently escaped from ASH and was (then) at large in the greater Phoenix community. The one's running ASH maintained this blatant concealment of the fact for the following 4 months, including after local news reports loudly published Murietta's role in April Mott's death almost 90 days after he escaped (as per Hensley's article).

   And the simple fact stands that if I- while hospitalized at ASH- had not taken the initiative to concern myself with fairly obvious administrative misconduct in relation to ASH's senior clinical and executive staff specific to the escape, there is every possibility that no aspect of the underlying history of this affair would have ever surfaced.

ASH's administrative staff, as well as executive officials in the Arizona Department of Health Services, including Director Will Humble,would have kept a tight wrap on the fact that an escaped ASH patient brutally murdered an innocent young woman, and Jesus Murietta would have never been identified as such. Likewise, if ASH staff had merely done the right thing and issued a formal report specific to Murietta's escape at the time it occurred, April Mott would still be alive today. This is the state of affairs as it stands today. ASH is still being run under the authority of the same goddamn people who directly caused this series of events to occur, including the same goddamn doctors, who are still granted the privileges associated with the responsibility of caring for and handling the treatment needs of ASH seriously mentally ill and highly vulnerable patients. The vulnerability of ASH patients extends to their voicelessness, and as this matter proves, even when someone such as I did everything I could at the time to draw critically due attention to the escape when it occurred, ASH administrators went around the mountain and back in squashing the merits of my initial reports to JJ Hensley, and my credibility as such, was temporarily put into question as a consequence of these administrators' lies. Thus, the cycle of violence that ultimately led to April Mott's death and Jesus Murietta's pending sentence in Maricopa County's criminal court was initiated by nobody other than the high ranking state employees that I have identified above (and countless times in the past); and just as they bent over backwards to refute my original reports about the escape itself, ASH's administrative staff are still engaged today in precisely these same sorts of tactics, willfully and knowingly preventing the truthful flow of information underlying these matters as a whole.

      I first contacted JJ Hensley of The Arizona Republic newspaper in order to report Jesus Murietta's escape within a week of that specific event, for it was apparent by then that the administrators of ASH had not reported the escape. The subject itself was being discussed by patients as well as staff, centered around the question "Why didn't the newspaper report this?" In my own right at the time, I had three very specific concerns, as follows:


1) I was worried about Jesus Murietta. I consider Jesus to be a friend,
this because we had met and grown fairly close in a Tucson area 
mental health facility, and I was sincerely worried about his welfare; I 
knew, for example, that he had made at least one very serious (lethal)  
attempt to kill himself, which was one reason for his hospitalization. 

2) I was worried about the safety of the public. Jesus has a propensity 
for violent outbursts associated with his mental illness and related  
hallucinations; in the Tucson facility, for example (St. Mary's Hospital
extended care unit [now closed]), I had witnessed Murietta very    
aggressively  attack male staff on at least 3 occasions, and at ASH, it was 
known that  he had attacked both staff as well as patients on numerous 
occasions, too (including within a week or two of his escape).

3) I was deeply disturbed by the fact that the administrators of 
The Arizona  State Hospital were engaging in what to me was an
unmistakably covert cover-up of Murietta's escape, which I knew 
was posing a direct and imminent threat to the public, as well 
as to the well being of Jesus Murietta, a seriously mentally ill 
and at-risk young man who had escaped the Hospital grounds in 
south central Phoenix at about 9 p.m. with nothing but the clothes 
on his back. By the time that this event occurred, I had become 
well aware that various senior ASH staff members are willing to 
engage in graphic dishonesty and unlawful patterns of misconduct 
clearly designed to condone and preserve ongoing patient abuse 
at ASH, so I was immediately suspicious about the underlying 
motivations relating to why they did not dutifully report Murietta's escape. 

Let me clarify here, that it doesn't take rocket  scientist to recognize and see through the nature of criminal misbehavior that I witnessed and was subjected to at ASH, but given the danger that these issues pose(d) to myself and every other ASH patient, I can attest to very real trepidation and outright fear for my safety that did arise as an undeniable consequence of the fact that administrators who have near utter control of each and every ASH patients' lives. I have- simply put- never felt so vulnerable and at risk of grave harm than at that time when I was a patient at The Arizona State Hospital, fear and deep seated anxiety that I still feel/effectively experience today, which has only arisen due to the grossly dangerous misconduct of those  ASH staff willing to flaunt a brazen disregard for the well being of their clientele as a matter of standard practice, in clear and irrefutable violation of the public trust.

     As stated above, I consider Jesus Murietta a friend. But more importantly, I recognize and value him as a human being. This is not to say that I in any way feel that he deserves anything less than full accountability, in his own right, for his actions specific to April Mott's horrific death. Jesus is not the first or only person I have considered to be a friend at some point in time, only to learn later that they are (were) capable of outright homicidal behavior. In such cases, I remember these individuals for their positive characteristics and never forget that they are human beings; I also attest that in my own right, I rarely if ever make friends with people who have absolutely no positive characteristics. Fortunately, there simply are not that many people like that in my world- particularly now that I am no longer around or under the care of such people at The Arizona State Hospital, including Dr. Perviaz Akhter, Donna "You are soooo busted!" Noriega, Joel "the mortician" Rudd, and so on. 

     Specific to the decisions and motivations underlying ASH's willingness to obscure the facts about the escape when good faith inquiries about the event were submitted by JJ Hensley, the individuals centrally involved at that time failed to exhibit the primary concerns that I- a lay person with no experience in administrative heath care- had after Jesus Murietta escaped from ASH in late May, 2011 (with respect for Murietta's safety, and that of the public), and instead put their own selfish interests first.   

     In Jesus' specific case, the bare bone fact(s) is that April Mott would not have died in late August, 2011, if not for the criminal misconduct of both ASH's senior clinical staff (e.g., Dr. Steven Dingle, who was actually promoted not long after this and still works for ADHS today!) and executive staff (Noriega, Rudd, Froio).

    Another bare bone fact is that Jesus Murietta would not have killed this young woman and be on his way to prison today if not for the criminal misconduct of these people. One citizen dead, another one headed to prison, because of these entrusted, high ranking, high paid, state employed individuals. All of whom are still employed in ADHS/BHS, at the expense of Arizona's taxpayers, and to the direct detriment of ASH's seriously mentally ill and disabled patient community. There is no happy ending to this tale, and these people are still sitting comfortably in the employ of the state, receiving pay that comes straight out of the pockets of Arizona's collective citizens. Getting away with it, lock-stock-and barrel.

   BUSINESS AS PER THE USUAL IN ARIZONA

     I am happy, in context, that this aspect of the tale is nearing its conclusion. Happy, as such, for April Mott's family and any other like individuals closely affected by the situation; and also for Jesus, at least to the extent that he now knows what the future looks like. He is a man, and I know that he is very strong. Perhaps Jesus will somehow survive this aspect of his personal life, and emerge a better, healthier man than he was when he escaped from ASH. Not likely, given the limitations of the prison experience, but possible, and if there is any one thing that I feel Jesus Murietta deserves today, it is the simple presence of possibilities. 

IN CLOSING: I have, in recent weeks, became acquainted with a very outstanding and deeply dedicated advocate for the rights of incarcerated persons in the state of Arizona. Her name is Peggy Plews, and she is doing a great job maintaining her own blog, which is entitled Arizona Prison Watch and can be found on blogspot.com. I will turn to her with specific respect for Jesus Murietta's case once I know more about his sentencing, including where he is to be incarcerated, because Peggy is very committed to doing all that she can in relation to numerous concerns relating to the rights of prisoners, including inmates affected by mental illness and other medical disabilities. As such, she is a good person to to have on our side, and I really appreciate her support of my work. We have discussed possible collaboration, and I anticipate knowing more about how that will shape up in the near future. 

Please keep up your dedication to helping me defend the rights, dignity, and general well being of Arizona's most seriously ill citizens. The patient abuse at The Arizona State Hospital is ongoing, of this I am rock solid certain, and it needs to stop. The abuse of hospitalized vulnerable adults

is sickeningly inhumane, highly illegal, and downright unacceptable. 

paoloreed@gmail.com 

ll

Rerun. All three of the Arizona State Hospital medical staff named as defendant's below (Akhter, Dingle, Lydon) played a direct role in the substandard treatment that I experienced at ASH, 2011-12. 

And the attendant fact of the matter is, legal conflicts of this form arise in relation to the Arizona State Hospital more regularly than any other like civil suits in the history of Arizona, across the board.

ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED Tuesday, June 19, 2012

The Dream Team: Akhter, Dingle, Lydon. Keep dreaming, doctors, keep dreaming.

      With all due respect for Mr. Magnuson, the case(s) below was a fiasco, as displayed by its overall history. But just like the fat pigeon named Walter (by my friend Iris), who eventually got nabbed by the feral cat pack at The Arizona State Hospital and eaten down to the last bone, I am of the opinion that doctors such asSteven Dingle, Pervaiz Akhter, and Lynn Lydon have grown overly comfortable with the illusion that they can get away with pulling whatever sort of clinically administrative abuse of their given authority that they choose to. This data is only offered as a matter of practicality. It is out there, we are interested, and I have the final word on what goes into this manuscript.  

Magnuson v. Akhter et al

Joel Shapel Magnuson

Defendants:

Pervaiz Akhter, Wesley Smith, Steven Dingle and Lynn Lydon

Case Number:

2:2010cv02562

Filed:

November 28, 2010

Court:

Arizona District Court

Office:

Phoenix Division         Office

County:

Maricopa

Presiding Judge:

Roslyn O Silver

Referring Judge:

Jay R Irwin (PS)

Nature of Suit:

Torts - Injury - Other Personal Injury

Cause:

28:1331

Jurisdiction:

Federal Question        

Jury Demanded By:

Plaintiff 

IN CLOSING: State employees have a way of relying on the federal courts to relieve personal injury cases such as Magnuson's, especially doctors, even if there is an 8th Amendment issue at stake, because the fed has little interest in determining whether or not the doctors have met their obligations in terms of their medical licenses (which are managed under the auspices state medical boards). None of the issues I am bringing to the table have anything to do with prisoner's rights under the 8th amendment, not at this point; and in the end, the matters to be critically reviewed via my work will directly relate to the licensure of each and every physician I ever dealt with at The Arizona State Hospital. It's not so fine a line as they want us to think. It's bright, and it shouts for attention.

       We are always nearing that point in time when we know we have made a difference. This is just that sort of situation, and the energy is growing every day. But I still need the support of anybody who has an interest in helping this cause. Anybody at all. I am only one voice, and the patients at ASH are literally voiceless. Please, get involved today. Let's put a stop to patient abuse at The Arizona State Hospital and throughout the Arizona Department of Health Services now. 

UPDATE MARCH 2014: THESE THREE RAT BASTARDS ARE STILL GETTING AWAY WITH THIER CRIMINAL MISCONDUCT, AS PER THE WILLINGNESS OF ADHS/BHS TO TURN A BLIND EYE TO THE STOMACH TURNING REALTIES AT ASH, AS A MATTER OF STANDARD PRACTICE.  
paoloreed@gmail.com

Prose

am i pained

by writing poems 
in a shabby louisiana bar
a bistro of sorts, at 1 a.m.
on any given morning
i ask myself
   "where, then, does the       
    atchafalaya lie,
    and bayou pierre end,
    with the rio grande river
    in mind?"

how far, then
did sartre peer
into the swampy distance;
and do child like children 
ever fall away?


given the absence of a canoe,
barge, house or john boat,
with a good dog, insect repellent,
a small caliber weapon 
a low powered outboard
    (in order to fight the not too often
     strong currents) 
pencils paper 
and a pocket sized spotting device

i am still drawn to the notion
of returning to new mexico 
by boat.....   
                   (c) pjreed 2012




notes:
   -photo d. nelson 
        (self/dave's canoe/wallace lake may 2012)

Prose

where our dead go to die


a lost tree,
a leaning tree

arched like grandmother
over the water
with falling leaves 
and falling ants
that crawl on my legs,

all an invitation 
to join a river. 




look at that thing, 
that water, that river
as though my table
a place for elbows
a surface to reflect
to be reflected, for

the things these waters have seen
it is a lifeline stretching eternally.   

irish girls, scottish boys
resolute and somewhat angry:
   "the water is dead
    it lies facing upward
    in a funeral home
    already powdered 
    for burial."   

no getting away from it
heritage and blessings. 

piece of wood
thunder, rain, disappointment
no relief in sight,
let it rain, then,

one turtle stretching
like a swan, on a log.

    a floating piece of wood
    on a river that extends 
    to the bottom of the world
    all things go, as all things grow, in time,

in time there is salvation
in salvation there is love.


out there in that desert
like a turtle on a rock
bearing itself in defiance
of a river dried like brick
telling itself something vain
is that godforsaken rathole
and the declaration:
   i am a god
   i am beyond reproach
   i am no turtle after all. 

where the dead go to die
there are buried 
behind the eyes of them
the onus of life recaptured
as in birth itself, 

herein such dead will revive, 
                                              resuscitate them. 

But the dead never die
in places like ASH- 
   misery too painful is undying,
   hear all our mothers' crying
   tears in a river, knowing
   that in order to die 
   there must be life.  

                      (c) pj reed 2012


paoloreed@gmail.com

"That man looks creepy as hell!" One Rat Bastard at a time. 

So, as a matter of me sharing my work with friends, including photo images such as this one, this verbatim statement from my buddy Jerry pretty well represents the general responses that I have been hearing every time such friends look at it. How's it feel, "Dr." Pervaiz Atkher, to no longer conceal your malevolent demeanor from the greater public, as has long been the case, yes? Nowhere to hide, sir. Maybe it's time to  catch the first flight (back) to your homeland of Pakistan, while the getting is good.  

As with all of my other comments to the effect, this is the state of affairs in Arizona's sole long term public mental health care facility, The Arizona State Hospital. A virtually surrealistic realm wherein some of the spookiest people one might ever encounter carry on with their day to day activities as though public policy and commonly established codes of civility don't exist. And to characterize a man such as Pervaiz Akhter as "spooky" is to put in nicely. The fact is, the associated misconduct and related ruthless nature of these sorts of people is common to the history of state mental hospitals across the board, facilities and operational shortfalls that are always years behind the standards; all of this to the direct detriment of the entire (ASH) patient community, absolutely counter-therapeutic in all senses, in shocking defiance medical standards. And as I have also said, it was not the patients at ASH who I came to fear during my time there- it was staff such this Rat Bastard. His face is a nightmare in itself for me today- literally. Bottom line, undeniable, and 100% consistent with the substandard medical-mental  health care practices and conditions at ASH.

Indeed: Why not do us all a favor, Patel, and get the hell out of here once and for all?

paoloreed@gmail.com

NOTE: Societally Sanctioned Psychopathy Personified: The Face(s) of Treachery, Depravity, and Evil. 

(originally published in early 2014)

INTRODUCTION

See below: Dr. Pervaiz Akhter, just one long time senior level primary psychiatrist (Pakistani trained), The Arizona State Hospital, Phoenix, AZ. I was unwillingly forced to have to deal with this monster because my first assigned ASH psychiatrist, Dr. Laxman Patel was fed up with what he characterized as my "nitpicking", this in a context of me taking my concerns to him- as per hospital protocol- about the overwhelming presence of abusive staff and associated administrative ineptitude. Never in my life, including with respect for the abuse I suffered as a child, have I ever had to face such a distinctly cold and inhumane individual, which in my learned opinion, underlies the behavioral character of Ahkter, and the more generalized indifference of ASH administrators. 

As bad as it gets.

SOCIETALLY SANCTIONED PSYCHOPATHY PERSONIFIED. 

ONE GLANCE AT THIS RAT BASTARDS FACE 

SHOULD DO THE TRICK. BUT IF NOT.... 

Fact as per the record: At that point in time when the administrators of The Arizona State Hospital chose to retaliate against me for openly voicing good faith reports about the patient abuse that I witnessed and experienced first hand as an ASH patient, this is the doctor who was  assigned to take over my needs as a person affected by serious mental illness and disability. No sooner- literally- than initially meeting this man, did I come to recognize his overt ruthlessness as a person (human being?) entrusted by all of Arizona's citizens to oversee the needs of anybody directed to ASH, should such a person take action as I did. In the context, I had been an ASH patient for less than 4 full months when former ASH's chief medical officer (at the time), Dr, Steven Dingle, (now the CMO of Arizona's entire behavioral heath clientele), willfully altered my established treatment plan, with no participation of myself, my personal representative(s) or assigned treatment team at that time, or anyone else who as per law is to be included in such actions. DIngle did therein assign this fucker to attend to my case, at that time, in absolute complicity with all aspects of these patterns of wrongdoing, as it stood at the time. Today in my opinion, it is all in the eyes of this Rat Bastard, a medically licensed thug in all senses. But see for yourself.

SOCIOPATH soh-see-uh-path, soh-shee-]

noun Psychiatry.

Definition

By Mayo Clinic Staff (www.mayoclinic.org) Antisocial personality disorder (which in contemporary terms includes sociopathy) is a type of chronic mental condition in which a person's ways of thinking, perceiving situations, and relating to others are dysfunctional — and destructive. People with antisocial personality disorder typically have no regard for right and wrong and often disregard the rights, wishes and feelings of others.

Those with antisocial personality disorder tend to antagonize, manipulate or treat others either harshly or with callous indifference. They may often violate the law, landing in frequent trouble, yet they show no guilt or remorse. They may lie, behave violently or impulsively, and have problems with drug and alcohol use. These characteristics typically make people with antisocial personality disorder unable to fulfill responsibilities related to family, work or school.

----------------------------------

NOTE: It matters not whether or not a sociopathic personality is clearly identified, prosecuted, or otherwise exposed to the public. As the above data makes clear, these are some of the craftiest snakes in the garden, as it were, and it is virtually unknown how many such wrongdoers function today in the overall tapestry of society(s); the fact is, such persons are as common as daylight today, in spite of the times, and this is due to their ability to successfully deceive much of any suspicion that may arise as they carry on their twisted misconduct. In my own personal experience, I have personally encountered all but two of the following men, one a long time dead (executed) serial murderer, the other Arizona's most powerful legal authority (still in office). And yes, even when it comes to a man I encountered through athletics, I was fairly able to sense the questionability of (these) freaks as soon as our eyes met, in effect. As follows:

...And on the list can go... Goddamn peas in a pod.

Armstrong (fallen public icon; drug dealer, chronic liar/cheater, fraud). 

Atkher(current [longtime] ASH psychiatrist; chronic abuser of power, liar, sadist/predator, of Pakistani descent and training/education).

Bundy (one time  state level legislative aide and law student (Washington, USA); convicted/executed serial killer, cultural icon). 

Forney (former ASH security guard [civil side]; twice convicted [2010, 2013] sexual child predator, current convict [Arizona Dept. of Corrections 2014-?).

Horne, aka Joel Rudd's boss (and current Arizona Attorney General).

Humble (current director Arizona Department of Health Services [since 2011]; abuser of power/public trust, manipulator of public discourse, bureaucrat personified, 100% behind the crisis now effecting ASH, as per current data). 

Nelson (ASH CEO 2011-12, ADHS/BHS Deputy Director ADHS/Behavioral Health Services 2014; proven chronic liar, abuser of power/public trust, equally culpable specific to the crisis now effecting ASH).

...And on the list can go... Goddamn peas in a pod.

ASH psychiatrist and primary attending physician Perviaz Akhter.

ASH security guard (2011-12) and twice convicted sexual child predator Roger Allen Forney.

Arizona Attorney General Tom Horne, and as such, ASH general counsel Joel Rudd's boss.

Former ASH CEO, current 
Deputy Director ADHS/BHS 
Cory Nelson

ADHS Director Will Humble.

What do these men have in common? In my experience, it is the patent willingness to look anyone in the eye and engage in grossly deceitful misconduct designed to preserve their dastardly desires and associated misbehavior(s), typically in relation to cavernous rifts in the context of their given conscience (or lack thereof), who have proven themselves as willing to act out with no matter with little to no regard for the impacts of their misbehavior on others. The fact is, each of these individuals has exhibited- to myself, and increasingly to the greater public- deeply unethical flaws in character that in one way or another represent some of (our) human species' most disturbing traits today, a gross lack of character that occurs in defiance of established codes of decency, common civility, law and policy. Notable that only Ted Bundy is known to be affected by serious mental illness, while these others are nothing more than trash. 

So far as I am concerned, when it comes to closely looking at the faces of such Rat Bastards - even if only through photographs- it is somewhat all in the eyes. Lurking here in our midst at any given time are persons who either got away with or are still getting with sickeningly depraved misconduct, far too often via the sanctioned shortcomings of modern society's institutional practices. Most troubling to the lay public, perhaps, is the related fact that no matter how clear the evidence, these sorts of men and women are virtually unable to grasp the nature of their own flaws in character; herein the underlying presence of psychosis specific to socio-psychopathic characteristics, as they play out in these persons day to day activities. As illustrated by the following data, largely flowing from the work of authors such as Kevin Dutton ("The Wisdom of Psychopaths: What Saints, Spies, and Serial Killers Teach Us About Success" 2012), Martha Stout ("The Sociopath Next Door" 2006) and Dr. Robert D. Hare ("Without Conscience; The Disturbing World of the Psychopaths Among Us" 1999), this ilk of depraved humanity does reside well within the parameters of contemporary society. As per such contemporary studies, below are the top 7 professions wherein some of the most lethally dangerous persons in the modern world today find safe haven and reasonable job security, in graphic defiance of commonly accepted ethos and codes of civil conduct. But let's look a little closer, as per more findings about the nature of these Rat Bastards:

Donna Noriega, Cory Nelson,
and Jeff Goldbloom. All fired
in 2015 for identified abuses of
their given authority.

1)CEO. (Cory Nelson, aka Donna Noriega's boss, both of whom served as Hospital CEO's). With the heartless greed and sadistic ambition displayed in Wall Street since the 2008 financial collapse, it may come as no surprise that the first place on the list goes to the modern day equivalent of a pharaoh. Capitalist positions of leadership offer power, autonomy, command, and status- a perfect battlefield for the ambitious and ruthless to compete. (Dutton 2012)

2) Lawyer. (Tom Horne, aka Joel Rudd's boss). Attorneys cloak themselves in the manage of their field, making the laymen reliant on their expertise to survive in a courtroom. In the fog of legalese linguistics and glibly twisted logic, you better pray your law you better hope your lawyer is the most bloodthirsty of the two (Dutton 2012, Stout 2006).

  




3) Media/culture. (Lance Armstrong). If our collective society is a living organism, where better for the egomaniac to reside than on radio, television, or any such position in the public spotlight. To be the voice of the people, the face of their information and entertainment, and to influence our collective minds (Dutton 2012)

4) Physician. (including surgeon, psychiatrist). ("Dr. Pervaiz Atkher). The field a medicine offers more than the power of life and death. It's a clinical world of high-pressure stakes, where decisions must be made with no emotion. What jog nurtures a bigger power complex, than one where you can control any person's fundamental health and wellbeing on a daily basis, tinker with their frail physical mechanics or mental/emotional traits, and aggrandize your status as a giver or taker of life? (Dutton 2012, Hare 1999)

6) Police officer/corrections officer/security guard. (Roger Allen Forney). The power of life and death on your hip, a badge of authority on your chest, a uniform of distinction, and a siren. Everyone's familiar with the stereotype of a bad cop- those officers who readily abuse their power, resent the people they are meant to protect, and use cold-hearted superiority to justify their viciousness. It's an unfortunate reality today that some of the biggest criminals lurk among those who've sworn to uphold the law. (Stout 2006, Dutton 2012)

7) Salesperson. (Cory Nelson, Will Humble). In a numbers game, there's no room for emotion. Who has the greatest mental prowess? Manipulative charm? Who can wield the finest array of half-truths to convince a costumer/consumer and close a sale? For those who like to compete for status and feed and ego through the defeat of others, there is no better place than sales. (Stout 2006, Dutton 2012). Civil Servant. Whether you're a minor level bureaucrat suffocating the masses in red tape protocol, a hair piece-smiling robot claiming to embody the American dream, or a hypocrite ranting about moral platitudes while keeping your gay sex slave locked in your closet- there's always plenty of room for sociopaths in the political arena. (Dutton 2012)

NOTE: The above photo of Dr. Pervaiz Akhter, is available online via Instagram, and appears to be pretty dated; but for what it's worth, his countenance has only deteriorated since this rather disturbing image was produced. Indeed, the face and eyes of reptile. Sadly (?- as though I really desire to ever see these faces again), I've yet to find photo images of  Joel "the moritican" Rudd, the long time legal counsel at The Arizona State Hospital, aka "Prince of Darkness." Who like the rest was
either forcibly removed or otherwise vacated his position following the exposure of ASH's outrageous corruption in 2015. Rudd now works as construction contract attorney. Quite a shift from a position in the Attorney General' Office, while in truth, he is lucky he wasn't disbarred.
  ---------------------------------

IN CLOSING: I have said it before: I could not make up or otherwise fabricate this shit, the data accrued during my thirteen long months of time as a patient in The Arizona State Hospital, and beyond. It is that simple, it is that bad, and it is definitely ongoing.

(JANUARY 24, 2016. Yes. Ongoing.) 

paoloreed@gmail.com