Two Year Anniversary

      I formally entered my first long term psyche experience two years ago today (May 04, 2010)., and seven months later I was admitted to The Arizona State Hospital (January 11, 2011). 

There are (or are there?) 
more important things to do
than to document
every inch of ground
that one covers.
Men, we are
so, so audacious,
not even seeing
the many burning ships
in the midst 
of that prehistoric ocean,
   with our fellows (the prior)
   shoveling and furling,
   for: "It is the sea
           that gives it, the vastness,
           the loneliness surrounding
           their dark and stolid souls..."   
Come home, brothers-
already you've sailed too far. 
                                             (May, 2012, [excerpt from Joseph Conrad, Youth.])

          In less than two weeks, May 17, 2012, I will represent myself on behalf of all the patients at The Arizona State Hospital in the first of four upcoming court sessions in the Arizona Office of Administrative Hearings. Specifically, in the May 17 hearing, I will be presenting my very well founded allegations concerning the gross negligence of ASH administrative staff to meaningfully follow their own rules and procedural policies in relation to the incident on July 07, 2011, wherein I was assaulted and injured by a staff person. Beyond the very real fact that the over aggressive and abusive technician struck me while yelling at me for no justifiable reason (Is there ever a reasonable justification for a hospital staff person to yell at a patient, much less hit them? Hell, no there isn't!), the dismal follow up by the hospital investigator and administrative representatives was, as per the usual at ASH, a grossly direct violation of my rights, protections and overall liberties as a mentally ill person and citizen of this nation, as per the US Constitution, the AZ Constitution, state and federal criminal and human rights law, and so on. And I can almost guarantee that the defense/denial by the Hospital's counsel will amount to discrediting me, the patient. I will be facing one or more representatives of the Office of the Arizona Attorney General in all four hearings, and no stack of valid evidence will get me past the radically disproportionate power dynamic.   
       No sign of unfairness, there, eh'? In itself, that fact is a shining example of the extent to how and why these state agencies-facilities get away with the radically unlawful day to day conditions. People with as much or more knowledge than I about how the state system operates tell me: "They all know about it, the state AG, the department of health authorities, etc.! They will do whatever they have to deny and then bury the truth in these instances." 
       That said, I am really curious, in fact, to see how far down they will stoop in order to demean and discredit me, basically in order to shut down my voice when the time comes for me to tell the truth and nothing but the truth. I am, without doubt, risking absolute destruction in terms of my entire role today as a fair minded and reasonably ethical person who seeks nothing more than to improve the dismal standard(s) of patient/client care in Arizona's Department of Behavioral Health Services. For all I know, they will work to jeopardize me in legal terms, there are any number of strategies that could apply in that context, and I know these things so well, that one or more of my associates have joked about my relative sanity, given the fairly deep risk that I am taking by venturing forth, quite alone, and doing what I can to get to the root of this state managed corruption. But in certain terms, I have little to lose, and I feel that I owe everything to my peers i the behavioral heath care system, because without them my journey through 21 months of hospitalization would have been the loneliest thing a human might experience.
        But fair warning to them, too, the rat bastards that they are, because it is all going to be described by one or more of my media connections as it unfolds, individuals who have been provided with each and every applicable document as the 8-10 month sequence of events specific to this case played out. I am not expecting to prevail in front of the administrative law judge, simply because the attorney general has their job to do -rat bastards that they are- which is protect the image and reputation of the Hospital and department of health, and the state AG is arguably the most powerful law firm in the state. So let them show their true colors when they deny the possibility that staff abuse ever occurs at ASH. With luck, I will in time catch all these people in the same loop of truthful disclosure, and I would love to know that current representatives of ASH' legal counsel pay their just dues, too.
       These things, for my friends (Wendy, Junior Wells II, Katherine, Andrew, Jesus, Ruby, Thomas, Edwin, Josh, Steven, and the rest, so many...) and family (all). My father used to say (or so I heard when I was young): "This is not a dress rehearsal" We, the Pickens men (who rarely die lying down) are still testing waters and searching for our own; and no amount of filth ridden scalawags is worthy of the pain they cause, in my experience= in the end, they all have to pay, somehow...       

            
paoloreed@gmail.com